Yental Rules

First of all this is going to be the most boring entry, for this I apologize. However,
my matchmakers are going to need some guidelines or I might end up dead in a
gutter (You never know with these crazy Iowa Staters).

Okay Definitions!!!!
Yental:

Definition according to Urban Dictionary
1. Usually Jewish and usually a woman, a matchmaker.
“Don’t be a yetal, mom, I don’t want a blind date with one of your friend’s
kids.”
Yenta

Definition according to Wikipedia
A busybody or gossipmonger. The name was used as the name of the
matchmaker in the Broadway musical hit, Fiddler on the Roof, was further
popularized in the famous movie “Yentl”, by Barbara Streisand, and the word has
also come to mean “matchmaker” in modern usage.

For my intents and purposes a matchmaker will be referred to as a “Yental”
because not only are they a matchmaker, they are trying to fix my future and also
they’re interested in the gory details of my personal life – which in fact – is the
reason why the are all setting me up!

Being a Yental isn’t going to be soooo easy. I mean a Yental can’t just grab a
hobo off of the street and expect me to marry him – right?

So guidelines. To be a Yental- you must be chosen – a personal friend- in my
inner sanctum. You must love me enough to want the best for me and look out for
me.

Yental Ground rules:

1. If you would never want to date this person or spend time alone with this
person do not set me up with this person. (So this means no hobos, crazy
people, potential Dateline players and none of your drug dealers) Really – this is a common
collegiate sense. I do not want to come away with bruises that I do not want.
2. Do not inform the dater of this project. Again common sense.
3. You can only be involved up to the first date. While I will most likely inform
you of my private life anyways this just means no more meddling.
4. You should be available for a “rescue” if the date goes downhill. This can
be as simple as a phone call or an emergency text. I just don’t want to be stranded in West Ames or even in the HUB with a person who has aventriloquist collection.
5.If you think the dater is ugly, I will also probably think the same. ( I can be a little shallow here.  My blog, my rules = I WIN)
6.  Don’t set me up on a failure date or just for the “lulz” (not my term). There
will be snark and sass even if the date is okay.
7.  If the you primarily desire friendship between the dater and myself then the
you will be present at the “date”.

Please – use your best judgment. We’ve all heard scary stories and I’m using
my life as a social experiment. Yentals – you have my life in your hands…



Yental Rules for Predate:
1. It is up to the Yental as to how much information the dater receives.
However, both the dater and myself must receive the same information.
For example if the Yental gives the dater my name and major, I must also
receive the dater’s name and major.
2. Facebook stalking is prohibited however phone calls and text messages
are okay
3. The Yental will be the primary means of communication between the
dater and myself.
If any of these rules are broken the Yental’s license will be revoked. I know, I’m
being a sourpuss, but these things can be seriously uncomfortable.

XOXO